Having a mentor is something I have always highly valued in my life. Truly, the older I get I don’t think you can have too many mentors. Business mentor? Check. Faith mentor? Check. Health mentor? Check. You get the point. Any/all areas of your life would grow with someone speaking life and truth into it.
A pattern I am noticing in my life though, you have to actually fully open up to your mentor. They are not judging you. They are there to help you every step. And to help you to the best of their ability, you have to give them your best. Here’s a little visual for what it looks like to keep things hidden and not bring your best…
Picture this: a house full of garbage. Garbage eveeeerywhere. In the bathroom, in the bedroom, in the kitchen, on the couches in the living room, in the entry way as you walk in. Guess what comes with unattended garbage? Rats. Little garbage = little rats. Abundance of garbage = huge rats. And lots of them. You can keep trying to get rid of the rats one a time as you find them. But guess what rats do? Produce more rats. But let me tell you something…
All of the rat-business can be avoided if you would just get rid of your garbage. Throw. It. Out.
That’s what a mentor is there for. To help you sort through your garbage, get it out of your house and then clean the floor and show you how to not have it pile up like that again.
I have been through a (few years long) season of throwing out my garbage. And let me tell you, my friend….I FEEL SO FREE. The most free I have ever felt in my life. I have 3-5 mentors I call regularly (yeah, really). We are not meant to do this life alone. These people have held me as I cried, prayed over me, spoke Light into my fears and celebrated with me as they witnessed me overcome. There are so many things I could say about how much I believe you need at least one mentor in your life. But let me start with these three.
1) They will tell you what you need to hear not just what you want to hear.
Guys. I love my mom. She is my best friend and confidant. But guess what? When I call her and tell her how mean someone is being to me or how life is unfair….she agrees with me. She sides with me. She looks at the situation through my point of view and feels it as I feel it. That’s great and moms are the friggin’ best! But some days I need someone to tell me that perhaaaaps I am not the one who is “right” in the situation. Someone to suggest looking at the situation from a different point of view.
(Same with your sister, your best friend, your aunt….they’re biased towards you).
When you have the same mentor over years, they will start to see your patterns. They can suggest that maaaaybe you are reacting to a situation not because you’re mad but because you're afraid. They see how you have reacted under pressure before and can remind you of the Truth that brought you through last time and will again.
2) They are a few steps ahead of you on a similar path.
In marriage. In business. In motherhood. No matter the situation there is someone who has gone before you. There is someone you can call and say, “Um, hi…did you feel like (fill in the blank) when (fill in the blank) happened?” The power of their reply being “Oh my goodness, yes! You are not crazy!” Can mean the wooooorld when you are having a hard day. They can warn you what to look out for. Share with you how they rested so you don’t burn out. Remind you of your passions and why you are doing what you are doing. Share how God had answered their prayers in a similar situation. Sometimes, we just need to know that we are not the only ones feeling the way we are feeling.
3) Celebrate with you!
This one has to be one of my favorite reasons have a mentor. To be able to call them up and tell them, “God answered!!” To shoot them a text and share that you completed that project you’ve been working on for months. To meet up with them, go for a walk and talk through the way that they have seen God moving in your life, when you maybe didn’t see it for yourself. Having someone deeply walk with you in your sorrows and celebrate with you in your joys is True Life. Life to the full. Grace overflowing.
So, sister. Do you have a mentor? If not, I deeply encourage you to step out. Trust me, the “right” mentor will find you, you just need to start looking. If you do have a mentor, reach out and share with them today how much you appreciate them!